Parenting a right or a priveledge
One thing that has really gotten to me lately has been the topic of parental rights. People that say they love their children yet decide they do not want to be their other half and then use the children some of whom never actually wanted to be parents in the first place as hostages.
If a couple is married one party can pick up and leave taking the children and many times the other half can not do much because if the law does ANYTHING at all it is considered custodial interference. In most cases regardless of who is the most fit parent the mother gets custody unless the father is military then the mother gets the screw.
Once the parent gets custody if they choose they can cut off all contact, get cash they don't use for the children on child support or even move or withhold any contact with the child or children.
I have friends of both genders who I know would be better for their children if they lived with them. In all those cases the mother left took the kids and decided even though they really did not want to be parents they wanted the child support and the sadist urge to hurt the other partner.
More so for males even if the mother is abusive they will keep the children with the mother out of some type of misguided sense of the past. Both parents should at the start have equal custody not be told when the other half leaves they need to file paperwork. I have only 1 friend I know who has custody of his kids and a few more that should because they are the better choice. In these situations the mothers I would not consider them anything other than egg donors just as I consider fathers who are abusive or decide they do not want to be parents to be sperm donors.
Being a parent though one can never be a perfect one should not be based on doing it to get cash or revenge on someone. Having children one knows they need lots of caring and attention not just the basics which some parents would rather plead poverty and then spend that cash on their own vices. It is ideal even if the parents are not together if they both love their kids to be in their lives. If they are doing it out of spite or the want of the extra cash they think the child will bring in then they should not be having them. I know too many that when one parent decided they wanted to be free where the children suffer too much. Children thrive best in a loving household be it one parent , two parents regardless of gender.
In the end being a parent is about being there for ones kids not to use as a pawn or as a cash cow as i know others that fake disabilities so they get checks that way.